An Ending With a New Begining or a new Begining after an Ending

I am writting this for a buddy of mine..... CL... well... err... we werent high school buddies cos she wasnt in the school i was in. ... she's my tuition mate... remember the times we use to truant and go to the arcade..... *shhhhhh nyahahahah .. which wasnt often .... i only did it once.. the other time my mom and dad framed me... those were the carefree(not the panty liner) days.... no worries.. no bills.. no taxes ... no commitments.

She's a great friend... pretty and cool... :) but we somehow drifted apart... i guess it was the college differences and also she was always going out with someone or she has a bf..at present.. even she is working 3 doors away from where i am .... we still didnt meet up ... i just dont know why ... she didnt either...

The last i saw her was almost 2 years ago ... when she announced the death of her father.. which was of course devastating.... for her.. and really really shocked to me... i was driving when i called her and she just cried.... and told me her dad just past on ... 2 MONTHS ago... i was of course sad for her.. and even upset because she didnt call me to pay the last respect to her dad... who was a great father.... he died of liver cancer/liver failure.....a very traumatic experience.....

We arranged for tea the day i called her.. and she picked me up ... we hugged when i got up her car... she teared.... i did too.... we stalled in at the mamak and chatted for at least 5 hours.. telling me how her dad lived his last days... we both cried.... She sent me back ..... and her last words were 'everytime i close my eyes.... i picture him and i miss him so much'...... we parted crying and hugging each other....

Less than a month later..... she called me crying..... ... her mom......has been diagnosed with leukemia.... it's like a big hit on her head... and a slap on her face.... and ... worst ... i didnt know what kind of consolation i could have offer.. it's not one of those things which you can say 'it's okay' ....... that was then the last time i heard of her over a 2 year period.....

Recently we met in a restaurant near to our office... and i shouted ... 'CL!!!! CL!!!!' we didnt hug cos i was sitting down.. and she was standing up... and she asked me how was i and all that... and she just said...'oh .. my mom passed away already......................' * with a bit of teary eye.... and i was SO STONED... it took me like minutes to ask her the next question 'when?' and she said it was last month. I was so sad..... so so sad....

Of course we just stood there.... and there was this moment where the time just paused and we seem like we were in a vacuum time frame ... and she broke the ice saying 'it's okay... i'm okay' i was close to tearing but my work mate was with me .. so i didnt say anything.... i went back to the office.. and i couldnt finish my work... i slowly did my work and CL was just at the back of my head.... i kept thinking... and thinking... it was just running in my head like a old film projector...

Gosh............ that was torturing.... for the fact that i cant picture being an orphan... and she is so strong to be one..... As much as i have different thoughts with my family member.... i wont be able to accept the fact that i will part with them forever...

i'm deeply sorry CL.. for the greatest lost ever.... but they are now in a safe place and your mom no longer has to suffer..... to Uncle N and Aunty N... Rest in peace